


The sweetest Song of saddest Thought

by Dunderklumpen



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Bittersweet, Established Relationship, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, M/M, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 12:26:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8372236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dunderklumpen/pseuds/Dunderklumpen
Summary: Deep down he was aware that her resemblance to her brother was the reason he had reached out to her in the first place.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [vix_spes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/vix_spes/gifts).



> My dear vix_spes,
> 
> I tried my best with your prompt to make you happy. Unfortunately it became sadder (and shorter) than planned. Hope you still enjoy it.
> 
> The prompt was: _Éomer/Faramir - Faramir can't help but feel guilty that he can't love Éowyn as she loves him ... because he's already in love with her brother and has been for years._
> 
> Written for "The Eleventh Annual Sons of Gondor Trick or Treat Fic/Art Exchange" over at sons_of_gondor @LJ.
> 
> Éomer/Faramir - established relationship.
> 
> Thank you so much to gothrockrulz who was a great beta! <3

_"Our sweetest songs are those of saddest thought.”_

_(Percy Bysshe Shelley)_

 

It is almost evening and spring lies in the air. It has been a warm day and Faramir is thankful for the coolness in the tunnels.

He knows the secret passages of this city. He loves Minis Tirith and as any good lover, he knows her ins and outs – an early necessity of his father's poor treatment. He breathes in, blinks once, twice - air leaves his lungs and his heart calms. He doesn't want to think about him, about the fire, about the loss... and ultimately about Boromir.

He stumbles clumsily and shakes his head. He can hear Boromir's happy laugh and feel the ghostly touch of a comforting hand on his shoulder. It's hard not to think of his family sometimes.

He leaves the tunnel and crosses unnoticed through the courtyard over to the door. It's nestled perfectly in the wall. Nobody who doesn't know this part of the city would imagine the oasis of quiet behind it. The heavy fragrance of roses hits him the moment he enters. He doesn't know if he feels happy or sad when he sees the flowers in full bloom. Maybe a bit of both - a reassurance that beauty still exists in this world.

The familiar stone bench in the corner is empty. Slowly he walks over and sits down. The sun starts to set and orange glow bathes him in a friendly reminder that there will be another day tomorrow. He's blinded and closes his eyes. When he opens them again, he sees Éomer, his smile as blinding as the sunset. Happiness swirls in his stomach. It's a feeling rare to come by these days. At least for him.

The city buzzes like a swarm of bees:

“ _The king will be crowned.“_

“ _He will bring his queen.“_

“ _A new time will begin...“_

“ _... a better time for everyone.“_

Faramir doesn't begrudge them their hope. He just wishes he could feel it as well. He returns Éomer's greeting with a small smile of his own and rises to embrace him. The new king of Rohan smells like leather and smoke, like freedom and nature, like everything he wants and can't ever have. But these are thoughts for lonely nights in his room. Now he wants to enjoy the moment.

„I missed you“, he whispers in Éomer's ear. The horse lord's answer is to hug him tighter.

„I almost lost you“, Éomer mumbles, his voice strained and desperate in a way the young steward of Gondor had never heard before. „Don't you dare do that again!“

Faramir huffs. But before he can let go, he hears Éomer's whispered „I love you.“

It's everything Faramir wanted, except...

His mind flashes back to an instant only a short while ago where he had heard these exact words before.

*

When he saw Éowyn in the Houses of Healing he knew immediately who she was. Her family resemblance was obvious to anybody who had met the Royals of Rohan. Bandages peeked out under her clothes and she looked frail and sad.

He knew exactly how she felt. So he started to speak.

Their time in the Houses of Healing was long, recovery a strenuous and boring task they both had to endure. The healers emphasized the importance of fresh air and sunlight. So they made a daily promenade their routine, and met outside to talk. He hadn't known it back then but her presence helped to ease his mind. He needed someone to listen and Éowyn was a trustworthy confidante. From there it was only a small step to friendship - formed out of sympathy and shared experiences.

Deep down he was aware that her resemblance to her brother was the reason he had reached out to her in the first place. But after a while he liked her for who she was, not for whom she reminded him of. After weeks of recovery under the watchful eyes of the healers, they were finally allowed to leave their gilded cage.

Out in the city he heard the whispers for the first time. Gossip of the old and curious, saying that Éowyn would surely become his wife. It was only talk, nothing he should care about. But he couldn't push it out of his mind when he met her again.

It was a warm day and they were sitting in front of the white wall. Like always they had shared their thoughts about everything that was happening around them. He was grateful for a friend like her, someone who had helped him greatly in the dark days after the war. She was a magnificent woman and any man would be lucky to call her his own.

He glanced at her as casual as possible while deep in thoughts. He could see himself with her at his side. Beautiful and kind, she would be the perfect bride for his people, for a new life built out of the ashes of the old. She would help him become the man he strived to be and would love him even more for it. He would love her in return and everything would be perfect, except for one thing alone:

Him.

Always him.

He was the one that made his heart beat faster, the one he couldn't let go. Nobody could ever replace him and it hurt that he knew exactly what it was he saw in her. What made him even consider this perfect life for a second.

She looked up, the feelings of adoration and love clear in her eyes.

It broke his heart because the only thing he saw, when he looked at her, was her brother.

*

Éomer sits down next to him, his hands resting on the stone bench. The last rays of sunlight catch his hair and it looks like spun gold.

Faramir catches his breath. “I'm glad you could come.“

Éomer smiles again – the one that is reserved only for him.

“I will always come when you call.“ Éomer's answer lightens Faramir's heart because he knows that he will as well.

 

 


End file.
